Saturday, August 4, 2012

Back to work...

Wednesday was my first day back to work and I really didn't want to go.  I even laid awake in my bed most of the night before, when the alarm went off I was already awake.  I cried off and on most of the day on Tuesday, at one point I was playing with Finn in the floor and my tears began to hit his chubby little hand and he laughed and grinned at me.  When it came time to leave on Wednesday morning my kids were still in the bed and hubs held me close to his chest where I cried again.

I hate being a working mom, granted Addison has turned out well by going to daycare since the age of 9 weeks old, but it's still very difficult.  Luckily, I never missed any of her milestones, I was right beside her when she rolled over, saw her first step and when she said "Mama".  Hopefully that will be the case with Finn as well.

On the flip side, I am lucky to see my kids every weekend, I have only been on two  business trips since I started with my company, and even so hubs came on one of them with me. I am lucky that I see my kids every night and the best part is that I have every other Friday off and 4 weeks of vacation every year. 

I fully trust the center where Finn is going to go and luckily he will only be there about 4 hours every day, hopefully we can leave the yucky viruses at school! 

Choosing to be a working mom or a stay at home mom was never an option for me, I HAVE to work, but I am hoping that maybe one day that I will have the option to stay at home with my children, and all that takes is prayer.  I am trusting that God will provide my husband a job that will give us a sufficient salary and that I can have the choice.  And when it happens I will praise him from the rooftops.

Until then...

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